Enterprise, you bastards.  They have had this commercial on for a little while now.  It features two of the whitest black people in the universe talking about how Enterprise is number 1 (probably in the area of making shitty commercials that create the urge to kill within us all) on the street of some suburban neighborhood that's probably outside of goddamned ass-stinking Cleveland.  The woman has goofy hair and talks in a quiet, almost monotone voice about how fan-fucking-tastic Enterprise is.  The guy, however, is wearing a non-descript green football jersey with a green star on it and he looks exactly like the gay guy from Designing Women.  Obviously there aren't enough feet in the world to kick this guy's ass as much as he needs it.  They apparently rented a car so that they could drive to the stadium to see everyone's favorite team, The Green Stars.  At the end, the guy says, "If they're number one, how come they don't have one of THESE?" and he holds up one of those oversized novelty finger-pointing foam hands that's colored green (I'm guessing for the world champion Green Stars).  The foamy finger of that oversized novelty hand, however, should've been colored brown and red, because I guarantee that finger spends 95% of the time stored in that guy's dirty ass.

And also, Enterprise, when you drive the car to some lazy bastard's house all wrapped up in brown paper (coincidentally the color of the inside of that guy's asshole), how do you see?  You have robots driving those fuckers, don't you?  Goddamnit, Enterprise; if Terminator has taught us anything, it's that robots will one day destroy us all, and you're giving them jobs as chauffeurs for stupid people that can't drive?  Fuck you, Enterprise.  When car-driving robots of death are running over your mangled corpses, I'll be there to say "I told you so."

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