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INTERPRETER I've been seeing
previews for this crap for a long fucking time. Since probably
December. It's finally coming out in a week or two or something, and
thankfully that means no one will have to hear about it again after that.
This movie is a Political Thriller, and if there's one solid piece of
evidence that Hollywood thinks everyone in America is a fucking idiot,
it's the phrase "Political Thriller." All of these movies are
exactly the fucking same. Some retard stumbles onto a huge
conspiracy (or a stupid plot that the filmmakers trick everyone into
thinking is huge, like The Insider), the people in charge of the
conspiracy try to kill the person that found out about it and at the same
time make sure no one believes that person, some shit blows up at some
point to trick the audience into thinking the movie's action-packed, then
with the help of a doubtful person, the crisis is avoided/whistle is
blown, the government blows it all out of proportion, and everyone leaves
the theater angry and feeling like a dumbass. It's the same equation
every fucking time, only for this movie, the variables are different:
Basically, this
movie is about a heinous plot to assassinate the president of some country
no one's ever heard of on American soil in order to make the rest of the
world hate America more. That's right, it's another movie playing
off everyone's crippling fear of terrorism, only this time it's a little
more subtle (ed. note: no it isn't). I can guarantee that this movie
will be about 2 and a half hours long, only have two things explode (one
of which being the bus they show in the commercial), a ludicrous amount of
boring, unnecessary dialogue, and Nicole Kidman's character won't die no
matter how much you want her to. Oh, and there will also be about
900 scenes of Nicole Kidman on the phone. Don't believe me?
 
Then you'll leave
the theater feeling like you were just mugged of $8.00. Anyone who
sees this is a fool.
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